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Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Walkin' My Dog Named Pooh

The heat wave continues. Temps reaching 100 in some places. Here by the ocean we've been fortunate the past two days to have a cooling seabreeze to keep the temps down in the high 70's low 80's. Just perfect for walking Morey, our 'it takes a village' dog, who belongs to Suzie and Jim across the street. He's a 90lb yellow lab and he poops like a circus elephant. Well, that's a bit of an exaggeration but not by much. Walking him in the off season is much easier because I take him through the dunes and when he makes a deposit I just bury it real good and pile some big rocks on top so that no one will step in it. But, it's high summer and Sue & Jim went away for 4 days so 2 walks a day adds up to alot of poo. So I took a plastic grocery bag and some paper towels on our first walk and cleaned up the doggie doo but I forgot that he always has more and I had knotted the bag and now I'm walking on the beach carrying my bag of poop hoping that he's done. We walk way down and on the way back just as we're getting close to where we exit the beach, Morey drops into a squat and drops a load about 20 feet from a woman with several small children on a blanket. The kids gape as I wave my bag and assure the woman that I'm gonna clean it up but my bag is knotted and I'm out of towels so I troll up to the rocks near the dunes trailing Morey behind me and get a stick with which to dig a hole and so forth. This takes several trips and I'm pouring sweat but I neutralize the landmine and wave to the woman and the solemn preschoolers and head home. The next night I leave for the beach with plastic bags billowing from my pockets and a half a roll of bounties under my arm. I get him onto the beach and while no one's around he does his thing right near the wall so I can pick it up. Then we walk way down the other way and sure as um, shit, we're almost off the beach and doesn't he let loose about 15 feet from 4 women having happy hour in their beach chairs. They all look and giggle while I wave my roll of PTs and claim to have the situation under control. They can't keep a straight face and I have to really work to bag the stuff without either of us stepping in it as the dog tries to wind himself around my legs. I drop the now 2 sealed bags of poo into the third bag and wave to them and off I go swinging my bag of poo from one hand to the other just like you do when you walk a dog. So thankful that Suzie and Jim are flying in late tonight.